Visits back home are not the same after having had children. Between 2018-2021 B.C. (“Before Child”), my trips home looked different – including activities and meet ups that were more flexible, spontaneous brunch dates, with more outings in the evenings. While my travels home always required some coordinating (flights, what to do, who to see, activities etc), I felt that I had more flexibility in my schedule and did not always had to plan my trips so meticulously.

Now traveling back home with children requires more preparation and organizing, which for me can sometimes feel stressful and emotionally tasking. However, after traveling twice back home since having my daughter, I have found ways to make these visits more enjoyable and less overwhelming. Just like with every other trip, this does require some *extra* planning at the beginning until you find your own routine for your family. However, the outcome for me has been a more positive, relaxing and enjoyable trip home now with children.

Consider your Child’s Schedule When Planning Outings

As my child settled into a more predictable nap and feeding schedule (minus the sleep regressions!), I have found it helpful to plan any outings and meet-ups with friends and family around my daughter’s schedule. This is important as I want to avoid my child’s nap time being interrupted or worse, having her skip her usual nap times which could throw off our whole day. Considering our child’s schedule when planning outings back home, means that we do most of our activities during specific 3-4 hours chunks of time before and after my daughter naps. Having set times when we can meet with family and friends allows us to plan in advance and provide our loved ones with suggestions on when we can meet. It also ensures our daughter has the energy for all the action of seeing loved ones!

Carve out Time for Slow days

When visiting back home, excitement and adrenaline are running on high. You might want to see everyone and go everywhere! However, I cannot emphasize this enough: build in slow days in-between your meet-ups and activities. In my family, we have planned for resting times in different ways: 1) planning for a full slow day in between jam-packed days and 2) included breaks throughout the day to help us slow down and unwind as we meet with family and friends. Both of these approaches have worked for us but it all depends on the day and what we have planned! Consider break times for not only the children but parents as well – wether is a short coffee break or a walk along a quiet area, parents need time to unwind and decompress as well.

Organize Meet-ups around Child Friendly Activities

This is starting to become a habit both when traveling back to the U.S., but also while home in Germany. Since my daughter could start walking, I started to consider planning meet ups around activities that she would find fun as well. Activities like grabbing coffee to go with friends and then walking to a nearby park where my daughter can play, going to children-friendly restaurants where I know the space is accommodating and welcoming for children or simply going for a walk where my daughter can enjoy some sightseeing as we take a stroll to catch up with family and friends. Organizing meet-ups around child friendly-activities allows for more relaxed visits back home while balancing spending time with loved ones.

Visits Back home do not have to be stressful now that you have children. Will it require more planning and coordinating? Yes! Is there a chance you might feel more tired and fatigued when traveling back home with kids? Also yes! However, like with everything in traveling and parenting, I have found it helpful to sit down with my partner and discuss our needs and wishes when planning a trip back home to the U.S. Consider the suggestions above and when in doubt, write down a schedule to ensure you are carving time for the things that are most important for you and your family during these visits!

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