As if the stress was not high enough already, the same year we were having our wedding was also the same year we were expecting our first child. While it all worked out in the end – both the wedding and the pregnancy – we definitely were living through a few stressful months preparing for both. So a few days after living the most magical day at our wedding, I grabbed a paper and pen and started preparing for my next (major) life event: having a baby abroad as a foreigner.

While expecting, there was this overwhelming feeling that we should have everything perfectly organized and ready for once the baby was here. I neatly stored away her diapers and put items into categorized baskets – so every item had a place. I searched online for hours researching all the top baby essentials and what we needed. It felt as though, we would check off one thing from our list, to then add another. It was a lot.

20 items in my online shopping cart later along with a “wishlist” that would not stop growing, I had to stop and reflect. As I considered what things we needed for a baby while living in a small city apartment (50 sq. mt. to be exact), I first asked myself the following three essential questions:

1. Do we really need this? This was always the hardest question to answer. It is hard to distinct between what you actually need and what society tells you that you should buy. As first-time parents, we often seek the opinions of others to make decisions. Specially when it comes to shopping for baby items. My best recommendation here? Stick to the basics at the beginning and add any additional items as needed.
2. Does this serve a purpose in the next 2-3 months? This quickly became my favorite question to ask myself. As a planner, it is important for me to feel both prepared but also allow room for flexibility. Reflecting on this question allowed me the chance to think honestly about what we might need in the next 2-3 months (alleviating any anxiety about not feeling prepare “enough”) and what can wait for later. Waiting to buy a few things until later gave me time to budget and research – helping us save money in the long run. While we did end up buying one or two items we only used for a short period of time (as things with babies are unpredictable and the thing they may like one day, may not be the thing they like the next), in the long run this question allowed us to cut down on buying too many unnecessary things.
3. Can we make space for this in our small city apartment? This was the easiest question to answer. Living in our 50 sq. mt. apartment near the city center of Frankfurt, we knew we would not have room for many things. While we are lucky that our building offers amenities like a Kinderwagenkeller or storage space for strollers and a regular Keller or storage space, we knew we could not fit many things inside our actual apartment. This helped us stay on track with buying minimal things and not overcrowding our space.

Asking myself these three essential questions, helped me cut my list by almost half and quickly became the guiding principles for any purchase I made moving forward. Of course, there were other items my husband and I purchased later on that we realized we needed. However, by not buying everything before the baby was born, helped us stick to buying things we knew we could make use of and that our baby would approve of. Disclaimer: please remember that babies have opinions too and simply because you think you might use it, does not mean that your baby will like it.

To help alleviate the stress of researching and having to figure out what your family might need, check out my personal Minimalist Baby Shopping List for inpiration!

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