I am now twice an immigrant, The first time I moved (from Dominican Republic to the U.S.) was not by choice but rather necessity. My family moved when I was 8 years old and we were after what so many others also believed to be the “American Dream.” Spoiler alert: with this move came a lot of opportunities but also, a lot of sacrifices. So the “American Dream” came at a pretty high cost (long working hours for little pay, lack of affordable healthcare and family resources, no proper paid parental leave, a constant “having to keep up” mentality that leaves you drained more than anything – just to name a few).

Having moved to Germany, I now find myself in a different situation, a privileged one. By the way, “privilege” was never a word I really used before to describe my situation so recognizing this privilege I now have as someone who chose to move abroad – is a different feeling. I moved abroad out of desire rather than necessity.

When I migrated to Germany, I did not have children yet. However, I knew this would happen for my husband and I as we both knew we wanted to start a family, I did not really take the time to research or think about what moving to Germany could mean for us when raising children abroad. All I knew was that Germany is a great place to raise a family – and it has turned out to be true for many reasons.

Now having lived here for four-plus years and raising my daughter here in Germany, I am more aware of what things to consider when thinking about a place to raise children in. So if you are looking into making a transition, either because of a professional opportunity to work abroad or are simply curious about the experience of living overseas with your family, here are some questions to consider based on my own experience:

1. Is a Different Language Spoken in this Country? If the answer is yes, then it is a good idea to start thinking about learning the language before making the move. Whether that is by spending a few hours on Duolingo every week or taking a proper class, my best advice is to start learning the basics before making the move abroad. This will not only help you and your family adapt more easily but, it will also help you feel connected to the local community and explore any opportunities while abroad. Keep the motivation going by finding fun ways to learn this new language together as a family.
2. What Family Benefits are Available for Expat Families (either via the employer or from the Government)? This is a big topic. Relocating your family abroad is not always easy, especially if you are not doing it through a company that offers support with the move. Research and connect with other international families about the benefits available to expat families. For example, in Germany, families can take advantage of tax exemptions, free childcare, and paid parental leave without being a European citizen. Knowing these resources exist and that your country might offer them to international families, will help you feel confident about moving your family abroad.
3. How is the Education System Set up in the Country I am Considering? Germany has a completely different education system than that of the U.S. Here, children have about 3 different learning paths they can take (Haupschule, Realschule, Gymnasium). While Germany has a more rigid education system where children are put on a certain professional path from an early age, there are many benefits like free education (including higher education) that families can take advantage of. Become familiar with how the education system is set up in the place you are relocating to. What implications does this then have for your children when moving from one school system to another? What does this mean if your family relocates back home in the future? Consider what this move means for your family when it comes to your child’s education and how this can impact their learning path.
4. What are our Long-Term Plans for Relocation? How long do you plan to live abroad? Is this a temporary move or are you thinking long-term? Moving abroad – whether it is for a short or long period of time – requires planning. Figuring out the logistics can be stressful and there is a lot to consider. However, if you have a goal in mind for how long you want to live in this new place, you can have a better idea of what needs to get done before your transition.
5. What Does this Transition Mean for My Partner? Finding happiness abroad, especially when relocating with your family, means that everyone is comfortable and ready for this major transition. For partners, if one is relocating for work or a professional opportunity, what does this mean for the other person? Are there opportunities for them in this country as well? What will your partner do during this time? Sit down as a family and write down your plan. Having transparency and discussing the realities of a big move, rather than just wishful thinking, will help create more realistic expectations for everyone. Plus, this helps everyone get excited about the move and plans for the future.

At the end of the day, it is all about weighing the pros and cons of moving abroad and doing what is best for you and your family. While I have witnessed first-hand the challenges that come with raising children abroad as a foreigner, navigating a different language and system. For me, there is so much more to gain from this experience. So if this is something you have been considering and you have the opportunity to try it out – this might just be your sign to make that move abroad!

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